What the everliving fuck. Of course I ask all my partners to give consent before I add someone new to my polycule. Every single time. Do you add new people to your polycule without consulting your partners just because they’re polyamorous? That’s cheating.
I don’t have to “tell” my partners I’m poly, because I don’t cheat. If you think you can just tell your partners you’re poly and then date whoever you want, you’re wrong and that’s a dangerous belief. Please never tell anyone else that polyamoury works like that, because it doesn’t. I’ve had to educate far too many partners who thought like you and would have cheated on me if I hadn’t been careful to establish explicit boundaries.
No, I’ve actually only ever had two partners who were monoamorous by default. The first two. Everyone afterwards immediately knew I was poly without having to be told. And was poly too. I mean I would have asked them to consent to being metamours with all my existing partners anyway so definitely no cheating since you brought that weird point up. But if you’re now deciding the point is people’s assumptions, everyone I know assumes people are poly. If someone in my circles is monoam they actually have it listed in their bio so everyone knows not to flirt with them.
Sounds like I just have gayer friends than you do and you’re assuming everyone is like your boring friends.
Decent point, but I also think it’s good to explicitly discuss monogamy as well. Even if you don’t use that word but only say “are we in a relationship”, it’s good to define the moment when the exclusivity begins.
For example I’ve had one date with a woman, and she was busy on my second attempt. I’d love to see her again but I’m unsure whether I will. Would I be a cheater if I went on a date with another woman right now?
Statistics, original meaning of a romantic relationship?
It’s been called open marriage or open relationship for a reason. Because the default assumption was it’s not. There’s even that weird term “cheating”.
Everyone acts like monogamous relationships are normal because they are. And polyamorous relationships are an exception. You’ll have to deal with it.
They shouldn’t. Lots of people don’t even know polyamoury is an option, and they’re groomed from early childhood to understand relationships as exclusive and to get jealous. That’s a toxic culture. It’s okay to have complicated and difficult feelings, that’s part of being human, but it’s not okay to pressure children into sharing those feelings as they get older.
I ask my SOs that kind of question. We’re bi polyamorous sluts.
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Why does everyone in straight society act like closed relationships are normal and have to make an exception for poly relationships? That’s so weird.
Also I’m not in an open relationship if you think open relationship means what I think it means.
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What the everliving fuck. Of course I ask all my partners to give consent before I add someone new to my polycule. Every single time. Do you add new people to your polycule without consulting your partners just because they’re polyamorous? That’s cheating.
I don’t have to “tell” my partners I’m poly, because I don’t cheat. If you think you can just tell your partners you’re poly and then date whoever you want, you’re wrong and that’s a dangerous belief. Please never tell anyone else that polyamoury works like that, because it doesn’t. I’ve had to educate far too many partners who thought like you and would have cheated on me if I hadn’t been careful to establish explicit boundaries.
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No, I’ve actually only ever had two partners who were monoamorous by default. The first two. Everyone afterwards immediately knew I was poly without having to be told. And was poly too. I mean I would have asked them to consent to being metamours with all my existing partners anyway so definitely no cheating since you brought that weird point up. But if you’re now deciding the point is people’s assumptions, everyone I know assumes people are poly. If someone in my circles is monoam they actually have it listed in their bio so everyone knows not to flirt with them.
Sounds like I just have gayer friends than you do and you’re assuming everyone is like your boring friends.
Do you even have any otherkin friends?
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Decent point, but I also think it’s good to explicitly discuss monogamy as well. Even if you don’t use that word but only say “are we in a relationship”, it’s good to define the moment when the exclusivity begins.
For example I’ve had one date with a woman, and she was busy on my second attempt. I’d love to see her again but I’m unsure whether I will. Would I be a cheater if I went on a date with another woman right now?
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Statistics, original meaning of a romantic relationship?
It’s been called open marriage or open relationship for a reason. Because the default assumption was it’s not. There’s even that weird term “cheating”.
Everyone acts like monogamous relationships are normal because they are. And polyamorous relationships are an exception. You’ll have to deal with it.
They shouldn’t. Lots of people don’t even know polyamoury is an option, and they’re groomed from early childhood to understand relationships as exclusive and to get jealous. That’s a toxic culture. It’s okay to have complicated and difficult feelings, that’s part of being human, but it’s not okay to pressure children into sharing those feelings as they get older.
Because that’s the social and societal norm. Regardless of how progressive a lot of the issues have been/are.