Late2TheParty@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year agoEnd of an era: Zoom tells employees to return to office for worknypost.comexternal-linkmessage-square143fedilinkarrow-up1850arrow-down123file-textcross-posted to: technews@radiation.partyhackernews@derp.foo
arrow-up1827arrow-down1external-linkEnd of an era: Zoom tells employees to return to office for worknypost.comLate2TheParty@lemmy.world to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square143fedilinkfile-textcross-posted to: technews@radiation.partyhackernews@derp.foo
minus-squareMajorHavoc@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up70·1 year agoThese are fun. For any other CEOs reading along, here’s your new policy/advertisement: Furniture Row could convert every employee workstation to standing only. Starbucks could require every staff member to go caffeine free. Underarmor could set a black tie dress code for all employees. Master lock could shut down their staff gym citing uncontrolled theft from lockers. Grayhound could ban employees from traveling together to events. General Mills could establish a rewards program for employees who participate in a daily morning fast until lunchtime. Atlassian and Salseforce could shift their internal help desks to in-person only with 100% paper records. Peterbilt could start an incentive program that reimburses staff for buying local.
minus-squareFlying Squid@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up15·edit-21 year ago Microsoft could require Macs for all employees. Xfinity could only offer dialup at their offices. Dairy Queen could only hire diabetics. The cafeteria at Purdue Farms headquarters could be all-vegan. Barnes and Noble staff must have a library card and check out books regularly. Amazon delivery drivers must have their license suspended. Bed, Bath and Beyond could require their floor staff to only come in if they haven’t showered.
minus-squarewavebeam@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up3·1 year agoDidn’t BBB go under, close all their stores, and sell their name to overstock.com?
minus-squareEcho DotlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up8·1 year agoIKEA now only buy from furniture row. Boeing ban employees from taking aircraft, citing safety concerns with their aircraft. USPS require all packages be delivered by courier - I can actually see that one happening
minus-squarePersnickityPenguin@lemm.eelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up8·1 year agoStarbucks bans coffee in its offices, cites study saying its bad for your health. Stocks herbal tea instead.
minus-squareEcho DotlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up5·1 year ago Atlassian and Salseforce could shift their internal help desks to in-person only with 100% paper records. That would probably be an improvement for Salesforce. I truly hate their software. It’s god awful.
minus-squareJakenVeina@lemm.eelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up4·1 year agoThat Master Lock one seems entirely plausible.
minus-squarejubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.workslinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up2·1 year agoI like the way you think.
These are fun. For any other CEOs reading along, here’s your new policy/advertisement:
Microsoft could require Macs for all employees.
Xfinity could only offer dialup at their offices.
Dairy Queen could only hire diabetics.
The cafeteria at Purdue Farms headquarters could be all-vegan.
Barnes and Noble staff must have a library card and check out books regularly.
Amazon delivery drivers must have their license suspended.
Bed, Bath and Beyond could require their floor staff to only come in if they haven’t showered.
Didn’t BBB go under, close all their stores, and sell their name to overstock.com?
IKEA now only buy from furniture row.
Boeing ban employees from taking aircraft, citing safety concerns with their aircraft.
USPS require all packages be delivered by courier - I can actually see that one happening
Starbucks bans coffee in its offices, cites study saying its bad for your health. Stocks herbal tea instead.
That would probably be an improvement for Salesforce. I truly hate their software. It’s god awful.
That Master Lock one seems entirely plausible.
I like the way you think.