We aren’t going to win consistently by appeasing terrible people who can’t change for the better without being celebrated. They will backslide the moment they run into anything that reinforces their bigotry if they don’t keep getting praised for being a decent person in public.

I am in my 40s and have seen this multiple times, people temporarily stopping their bigotry for a while because of pressure from friends but then reverting the moment some bigoted group makes them feel good about their bigotry again.

The only ones that overcome their negative influences long term are the ones who actually felt bad about how they acted in the past.