When I first joined this community I saw it as a respite from reddit where I was free to chill with people without being constantly expected to debate or defend arguments or anything. Just a forum where people are nice.
Lately though it seems every active comment section is filled to the brim with, to be frank, obnoxious people who want nothing more than to fight with you about everything you say. I think they’re known as “debate bros.”
I’m not saying debate shouldn’t be happening but to be honest it’s disappointing seeing it be the only thing occurring. I’ve tried contributing in other fashions but have been met multiple times with people trying to start arguments with me about things or get me to defend “points” that I didn’t make. This in particular has been very annoying. I’ve reported every instance of this due to it not contributing but I feel as if that’s not helping.
I like talking to people I disagree with. I like conversing with differing opinions. But I feel alone in that this isn’t the only thing I want to do on a forum.
Again, I’m not trying to definitively say we shouldn’t debate at all, but just pointing out how prevalent it seems to be. Id like to just converse with people without being expected to make and defend points. I feel like that’s a major thing we should’ve left on Reddit.
If people want to debate then they can do that. I just dislike that it appears to become the base-level expectation for the instance.
Yes, I think some of it is Beehaw-specific because everyone flocked to Beehaw with the idea of building a better community and being better then slowly reverted back to their Reddit-arguing selves.
Lemmy/kbin/Fediverse was also very bubbled to Linux and privacy-focused people, now it’s grown and keeps growing and that original bubble is very closed-minded. I’ve found a few times where I’ve mentioned some generally obvious things like “deleting Facebook means that a lot of people can’t talk to the elder folk in their family.” a common thought that is generally agreed upon but yet I got a bunch of people saying that was bullshit. A phrase I’ve started to like is “terminally online” which Lemmy seemed to be filled with. People who refuse to see there is another opinion out there and that even their opinion isn’t common. Even when their opinion is refuted by statistics. They seem to just press on.
So I see more arguing on two levels. 1) Beehaws NRE has worn off. 2) Fediverse got an influx of more people bringing in a more common mindset that the old Fediverse crowd was generally against because they lived in a bubble. (which I know I’ll get a lot of hate and arguments of “no, we didn’t”, “Linux is clearly the best OS”, “Microsoft is literally Nazis!”, “Privacy isn’t dead yet!”
Just in my experience a lot of people on the Fediverse seem to have the attitude of “my opinion is the facts” or “the one thing I read on the corner of the internet with no cites is the definitive fact!”. They are more closed off than Redditors. It’s been surprising how many posts I see saying “We don’t need to be like Reddit!” To then discover they aren’t like Reddit, they are far worse.
Frankly, this whole thing has made me second-guess trying to leave Reddit behind. The only thing stopping me is a decent phone app to it. I could see myself somehow trying to set up a PWA with RES built into it if that’s even possible. I see far more decent conversations (and open-minded people) on Reddit than here at this point and it’s a huge shame.
A lot of it is very black and white thinking/refusal to see nuance…
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Absolutely agree! There is no wiggle room. These arguments are usually someone saying something definitive and someone else saying “No, it’s directly this way and always this way. There are no alternatives!” or “The alternatives are unethical, and if you use them your entire existence is unethical!” or worse “I am superior to you if you use these unethical alternatives because I can get by without them!”
I block them all. Honestly I like it here, but if it gets too frustrating, then I might contemplate going back.
There’s a lot of that here, I block more than a few each day.
The generalization.
From capitalism, landlords, privacy, microsoft, non FOSS apps.
If you even post something positive about these things, they’ll pile up on you. It’s sof the real world is a simple binary thing where there’s nothing in between and all people are one dimensional.
Some days are more frustrating than others.