You discribe both nightmares and anxiety realy well with your explanation IMO. And intrusive thoughts probably follow the same “brain has a target, and just fills in the details to fet there” too.
Those people vaning away because of a girl 6 inches shorter though, I mean it’s just 15cm?? Even a shorty can find girls 15 cm shorter, right? Amazing.
It’s really unhealthy to categorize people by something as superficial as height though. I’m about 1 inch taller than my husband. The only consequence of that is the fact that it looks kinda silly if I wear really high heels. He’s not self-conscious about it, I’m not self-conscious about it, and if either of us placed value on the woman in a heteronormative relationship needing to be shorter, I wouldn’t have ended up with the love of my life.
Writing someone off because of one stat/measurement is absolutely insane and I think a lot of people would be happier if they quit or heavily limited their social media use to limit the torrent of self-criticism from comparison that come from social media.
The thing you can change is your outlook and interpretation regarding the immutable parts of yourself. Your attitude about something is almost always much more important than the thing itself when it comes to relationships.
You discribe both nightmares and anxiety realy well with your explanation IMO. And intrusive thoughts probably follow the same “brain has a target, and just fills in the details to fet there” too.
Those people vaning away because of a girl 6 inches shorter though, I mean it’s just 15cm?? Even a shorty can find girls 15 cm shorter, right? Amazing.
It’s really unhealthy to categorize people by something as superficial as height though. I’m about 1 inch taller than my husband. The only consequence of that is the fact that it looks kinda silly if I wear really high heels. He’s not self-conscious about it, I’m not self-conscious about it, and if either of us placed value on the woman in a heteronormative relationship needing to be shorter, I wouldn’t have ended up with the love of my life.
Writing someone off because of one stat/measurement is absolutely insane and I think a lot of people would be happier if they quit or heavily limited their social media use to limit the torrent of self-criticism from comparison that come from social media.
Yes exactly.
Especially things you cannot change, but I guess that’s the thing making it even worse.
The thing you can change is your outlook and interpretation regarding the immutable parts of yourself. Your attitude about something is almost always much more important than the thing itself when it comes to relationships.
Yes, and in reverse, make some tiny thing a huge problem is also possible :-)