Day One
Dictator Trump: I am disbanding the US Constitution, and implementing a new one that gives the Office of the President supreme power. Whatever the President says becomes law and supersedes Congress and the Supreme Court. The sole purpose of Congress and the Supreme Court are to support the President however it’s requested by the President. Anyone that disagrees with the President will be immediately be found guilty of high treason and punished by death without a trial. Only the President can decide who is allowed to run for President in elections. The only person that can adjust this constitution is the President, and only in order to give the President more power.
Day Two
President Trump: Sorry, guys. I’m just following the new constitution that the dictator before me implemented. ¯\(ツ)/¯
You joke, but that is uncomfortably believable.
I can see why people would think I’m joking, but I am not. This is the kind of bs he would pull. He’s warning us, bragging, and setting us up to shift blame onto us at the same time.
Can’t believe you guys are going to vote this guy in.
Most of the nation doesn’t want this, the problem is that the 30-40% that do are the ones who actually go to the voting booths. Worse, they show up armed to the voting centers and stand around intimidating people under the guise of “ensuring security” or some other bullshit
To be fair, he didn’t win the popular vote and probably won’t again. He’ll still get elected because of our fucked up rules, though.
e: replied to wrong comment
I’d sooner vote Jeffrey Dahmer into the presidency. And yes I realize he’s been dead for almost 30 years. But I’d rather have his dead corpse in there than a decorative autumn squash with pussy breath.
You think he has pussy breath? That man has never done a sexual act for his partner’s pleasure in his life
I can. My fellow countrymen are fucking idiots who literally believe every lie they’re fed as long as they get it from someone with the magic ® next to their name. The intended result of having a dogshit educational system.
I will not rob the bank
Except when I feel like I want to rob the bank
This time I’m just going to case the joint and rob it a little.
Oh good that makes it all better then… /s
Well that’s comforting. I was getting tired of Democracy and freedom anyway, and who ever really believed all men are created equal and have equal rights? What nonsense. Now we can truly wipe our asses with the constitution, lock up all sodomites (ie anyone who isn’t white and hetero) and send anyone with a foreign sounding name to Guantanamo Bay where they belong. I for one am brushing up on my goosesteps and gas chamber administration skills.
See y’all, enjoy the apocalypse, us sodomites’ll warm hell up for the rest of you. If we don’t it might be chilly compared to earth in the 2050s
One good thing about going to hell, I’ll finally be warm, and with people I recognize. And I have no qualms about men in red tights poking me in the butt with pitchforks. Good for them, I say.
Trump used to be a fascist, he still is but used to too.
RIP in peace Mitch
I wish more people took after my boy Lucius Quinctius Cincinnatus and actually be a good dictator who resigns like, two weeks after he’s appointed.
EDIT: should clarify I meant a good dictator as in a dictator who does whatever needs doing to improve or solve a problem in a way that strictly leaves the people better off. Y’know, the original intent of the position.
And if Biden wins, Trump will recognize the inevitability of his imprisonment and kill himself. Then he’ll be dead from day one to the rest of eternity, which is a better deal from where I’m standing.
He doesn’t have it in him to kill himself.
Good point. It’s not like him to do anything beneficial for the rest of humanity.
