Okay the title is a bit exaggerated, but honestly not far off. This post is very mundane and a bit long, but thought it fits the community.

I’m visiting my home country and went shopping for pants, there were “30% off everything!” signs with a tiny text underneath that said “member discount” (don’t have membership). Not a problem, did not notice and I don’t care for such marketing tricks to get you into the store but okay.

Picked up couple of pants, went to the cashier and they asked me “do you have our membership?” - I answered no and expected the follow up question whether I’d like to join, but, to my positive surprise the cashier just happily responded “okay, not a problem!” and continued to bag my stuff.

I stood ready to pay and then the cashier said “now I just need your phone number and you can pay”. Hold up. What. I did not expect that, I honestly had a burst of anger inside me (never gonna take it on a cashier, they are just doing their job). I asked nicely why do I need to give my phone number and I was told that to register me as a member so I can get the discount.

I declined and said I don’t want to join and would like to just pay.

The entire interaction after questioning why they need my phone number was awkward, as if I had been the first person to decline, the weirdo, aluminum foil hat wearing hermit.

This was just one of many interactions in the recent years that make me feel as if I was a weirdo for not sharing all my info around. The worst is when everyone keeps telling me “its just an app, just download it and use that why do you make things complicated” or “just sign up you don’t need to pay anything”.

Thank you for reading my mundane rant, would you like to hear more? Just sign up for my weekly mailing list! Your email will be shared with our 12 453 partners

  • DNOS@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    1 hour ago

    Why don’t you just lie … Each time a different name surname email address physical address phone number … Yeah sometimes it’s Mandatory to use a real address for delivery purposes just put a random name in and add a post-it on the doorbell saing something on the line of leave packages for Crudelia demon here please. Temp mail for most discounts is enough… The test cases in which they do not only ask for your phone but also want to verify it it’s pretty slim …

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 hour ago

      That’s the advice I’ve gotten here pretty much, and will probably deal with it in that way from now on!

      It is sad that we have to do that, but don’t think this will change any time soon.

  • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    3 hours ago

    This is sadly very common where I’m from, except you don’t even get a discount from it. I’ve taken to just politely declining, since I’m sure the person working the cash is probably pressured to get people to give their personal info.

    “And can get your email?”

    “No thank you”

    “I need your email for the receipt”

    “I appreciate it but no thank you”

    It’s a slight non sequitur while still being polite. Saying “no thank you” when someone is pressuring you works well in many situations.

  • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    9
    ·
    edit-2
    3 hours ago

    I do this all the time.

    “Can I have your address?”

    “For a haircut? No, will it let you skip it? Ok good do that then, thanks. I don’t need 50 new mailers a month about damn haircuts, you feel me.”

    Problem solved.

  • liliumstar@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    13 hours ago

    Every time this happens to me, the clerk/cashier just shrugs and is like, “okay”. They get it, but are obligated to try anyway. The best you can do is be polite.

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      9 hours ago

      100% would never want to make their day tougher than it already probably is.

      This hermit politely declined, paid, thanked, and left. The anger I felt was towards the retail company and the clerk doesn’t need to witness that.

  • BallsandBayonets@lemmings.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    22
    arrow-down
    5
    ·
    17 hours ago

    “Would you like to donate money to us that we pretty pretty promise will go to some vague charity while we reap the tax benefits? No? Are you sure? Fine, we’ll just ask you next time (regardless of your answer this time).”

    • pmc@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      10
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      16 hours ago

      What tax benefits? Sure they can deduct the donation, but that just cancels out the income from you giving them the money to donate. It’s net zero for the company.

      • Stalinwolf@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        6
        ·
        12 hours ago

        I hear the charity tax myth all the time and I don’t understand why everyone just believes it.

        • Rhonda Sandtits@lemmy.sdf.org
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          6
          ·
          9 hours ago

          Obviously, it’s not possible for a store to claim a tax deduction for a customer’s charity donation. But, the store can claim tax deductions for the cost of collecting the donated money on the charities behalf.

          Costs would include: a percentage of the staff members salary for asking the customer to donate, equipment costs to modify the registers to process donations, a percentage of the credit card transaction fees, a percentage of the shop lease costs, etc etc.

          Initially, it sounds ridiculous as the real costs of what I listed above would realistically land somewhere between zero and shit-all. But we can be sure that the businesses that ask their customers for charity donations have all the numbers geared heavily in their favor.

          • CrazyLikeGollum@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            5
            ·
            8 hours ago

            Except all of those things you listed would be business expenses which aren’t taxable as they would be deducted from gross profits as part of the calculation for determining net profit (which is the taxable part of profit) and if they’re also using that as a charitable contribution then they are deducting it twice which the IRS tends to frown upon. Or at least they would if they had any kind of worthwhile enforcement mechanism for dealing with corporations.

            I would assume the tax agencies of countries outside the US similarly frown upon such double deductions, possibly even with effective enforcement.

  • Max-P@lemmy.max-p.me
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    29
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    19 hours ago

    Everyone’s approaching this from the privacy aspect, but the real reason isn’t that the cashier thought you were weird, they’re just underpaid and under a lot of pressure from management to try multiple times and in some cases they even get written up for not doing it because it’s deemed part of their job. They hate it just as much as you. Same when you try to cancel your cable subscription or whatever: the calls are recorded and their performance is monitored and they make damn sure they try at least 3 times to upsell you, even when it’s painfully obvious you’re done with them.

    Just politely decline until they asked however many times they’re required to ask and move on.

    • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      3 hours ago

      … they’re just underpaid and under a lot of pressure from management to try multiple times and in some cases they even get written up for not doing it because it’s deemed part of their job. They hate it just as much as you.

      I’ve worked retail and call centre jobs and I can assure you this is many people (at least those who are not too exhausted to care). These workers are constantly pressured to enshitify their service at the expense of theirs and the customer’s experience.

      I haven’t worked a counter in over a decade, so can only imagine it’s got worse.

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      17 hours ago

      I did politely decline and didn’t want to make a fuss about it - the title is bit exaggerated and from outside perspective it probably wasn’t that dramatic.

      I know that the cashier is just doing their job and I didn’t want to make their day any harder than it probably already was. I smiled, thanked and left right after paying.

      Hope I don’t sound like a karen, just wanted to share my mundane experience in this community since I really love the discussion that is going on in this thread. I do hope that all of us in this community still remember the human when interacting with people in the real world.

  • beefbot@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    30
    ·
    20 hours ago

    Stores will never respect your privacy or data, so you have no obligation to respect a corporation’s expectation of truth.

    Just have memorized fake data ready for bullshit like this, say it when asked. Then the retail person who cares even less than you about it (but is forced to pretend they do, in order to survive) can get to their break faster. Win win

    • Robust Mirror@aussie.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      10 hours ago

      Yeah in Australia I just use my home phone landline number converted to a mobile number, first 2 numbers are state code so like 02 1234 5678, mobile numbers are the same but 04 at the start. No idea if it is someone else’s number but I haven’t clashed yet.

      • MuffinHeeler@aussie.zone
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        8 hours ago

        I use 0400 000 000. I’ve had a couple of looks, but just smile and nod. I also have a spam that’s called <name>'sSpam@hotmail.com. I should make a spam account without my name though. I never log in. It might be dead by now.

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      17 hours ago

      Very good point, it seems to be the most popular advice in this thread and will try this next time!

  • fuViWwE3VQ2475@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    80
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 day ago

    (Your Area Code) 867-5309. None of the younger store clerks know the song reference when I give them this number. But I get chuckles from older folks in line behind me

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      32
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 day ago

      There’s usually already an account with that number, so just try it out. You probably don’t even need to actually open an account. BTW, if you do open an account, don’t expect that a fake phone number is going to keep you anonymous. Everything is linked these days. All of the big data brokers are buying and selling information to each other. The second you swipe a card, it’s going to match that card to real information from some random online purchase 95 years ago, and they’ll have all of your real information, including political preferences, address, phone number, all of your email addresses, ethnicity, height, weight, sexual preferences, everything. They have it all, and it’s all linked to every credit card you have ever used.

      • The Doctor@beehaw.org
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        22 hours ago

        Grocery stores. Picking up prescriptions at the pharmacy (there have been a couple of months where I couldn’t have afforded the cost if there weren’t discount points on 510-867-5309). Stuff at the hardware store. Target, occasionally.

        • Zedd @lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          20 hours ago

          I’d use that number all the time and not take the rewards. Glad my stupid tech job was actually used for something good.

    • FiveMacs@lemmy.ca
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      22 hours ago

      I just search online for the stores number and use that. They can bear the burden of their own bullshit spam

  • seaQueue@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    19 hours ago

    I stood ready to pay and then the cashier said “now I just need your phone number and you can pay”. Hold up. What. I did not expect that, I honestly had a burst of anger inside me (never gonna take it on a cashier, they are just doing their job). I asked nicely why do I need to give my phone number and I was told that to register me as a member so I can get the discount.

    “Sure thing, It’s +XX 111 222 3333” Just give them garbage.

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      17 hours ago

      That’s probably exactly what I’ll be doing from now on. Was hoping for the simple “would you like to join?” but guess that’s out of style.

      • meliaesc@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        2 hours ago

        I think the cashier was under the assumption that you wanted the discount, and asked at the end instead of immediately after you said you weren’t already a member. It doesn’t feel rude or invasive, from my perspective, maybe just phrased as an underpaid employee.

        What I do recommend is a VOIP phone number and attached separate email for all marketing purposes. They can track and sell that as much as they’d like without impacting your personal details or necessary accounts.

        • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          1 hour ago

          Haven’t looked into VOIP phone numbers before, thanks for the tip!

          Could have been that too. I was polite and didn’t fuss about it thankfully!

  • CHOPSTEEQ@lemmy.ml
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    16
    ·
    21 hours ago

    When I worked retail, I never asked for phone or address or anything. If they volunteered it, I’d do it, but I never asked. Management talked to me about it several times and I just kept not doing it. I think they kept me on in busy times because I could blast through any line of customers faster than anyone else (I wonder why 🤔)

  • Imprint9816@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    edit-2
    20 hours ago

    I think your misinterpreting your own social anxieties as being made to feel like an “outcast”.

    The fact of the matter is it’s just not normal to question why a store wants your phone number and I’m sure the cashier was taken aback by the whole situation.

    Convenience, not privacy, is the norm. There is going to be tons and tons of awkward social interactions when you go against social norms. Accept it and be proud your advocating for your privacy.

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      18 hours ago

      Yeah the title is a bit of an exaggeration of my feelings and as you mentioned, I was a bit anxious too since I have been abroad for quite a long time (and encountered something I did not expect in what I thought was an environment that could not surprise me).

      Agreed, it could very well be that I was the first customer to question since the cashier started working there.

      Thanks for the uplifting comment!

  • Em Adespoton@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    40
    arrow-down
    1
    ·
    1 day ago

    I had this experience once in an Ikea, of all places. I calmly told the clerk that according to local laws (which I cited), it was illegal for them to demand that information from me (phone number and post code) to sell me anything, and if the computer wouldn’t let them do it, then they should call a manager for an override.

    When the manager came, the clerk said “this person refuses to give me their info” — to which I added, “your computer refuses to comply with the law; please override and then notify HQ that they are in contravention of the law and liable for significant fines.”

    The next time I went in, they still asked me for the info, but the clerk was able to override. I suspect they just put in fake info for everyone who refused to supply it.

    • JubilantJaguar@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      21
      ·
      1 day ago

      Well done for taking a stand. The problem, as ever, is that most people prefer to comply obediently even if it feels wrong. And then next thing we know, it becomes standard practice.

      BTW I have been in your situation and responded similarly. Usually it ends in the clerk inputting dummy info, sometimes after I irritably tell them to do so.

      • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        1 day ago

        I can imagine that the tactic used on me works - same as making the hide/close/disagree button small. Dark Patterns in real life.

  • paysrenttobirds@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    35
    ·
    1 day ago

    Maybe just an awkward sales agent, or they thought you were mad at them for in their mind trying to help. I decline phone number and zip code all the time. Also been using someone else’s phone number at grocery stores for years – started by mistake. I don’t care about accumulated points or whatever but discounts at grocery store are pretty significant for me.

    But I understand your frustration in general. Keep up the good fight :)

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      12
      ·
      1 day ago

      What’s frustrating is that they’re not real discounts. The Club Price is the regular price, and you have to agree to tracking in order to not pay above retail.

    • bobs_monkey@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      13
      ·
      1 day ago

      Any time a store asks for a phone number, I use the local area code followed by 867-5309, and 9/10 times it works

    • Empricorn@feddit.nl
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      23 hours ago

      Yeah, I think this was just a hard sell, and it works. My friend and I were apartment shopping and had already checked out a few places. Then we arrived to look at another complex and after meeting with them, we said we’d let them know if we’d like to move forward. They were very friendly, but pushy, saying “no, you don’t have to do that”, “you’re moving in here!”, that kind of stuff. Being naive and lazy, we just said okay and took the path of least resistance. Oh well, gotta live somewhere!

    • Lazycog@sopuli.xyzOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      1 day ago

      I can relate, and agree that maybe the cashier found it just as awkward. Tried to be as nice as possible because I know its a tough job!

      Thank you and you too, fellow privacy enjoyer!