• jaybone@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    The trick is to cover the eyes and entire head with aluminum foil, then soak the animal in kerosine before making your child watch you microwave it.

    • ricecake@sh.itjust.works
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      3 days ago

      Ah, I was thinking you’d want it to ignite in the child’s hands to really maximize the lifelong trauma and deep seated trust issues.

      • jaybone@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        This is a much better plan, but how do you ensure the delayed ignition? Some kind of det cord? Or a chemical catalyst?