I used to work for a large corporation and one day I found myself in a meeting with a bunch of female vice presidents where I was the only man there. The presenter was unable to display on the big screen because she didn’t have a connector; I happened to have the right kind and loaned it to her.
She said “you’re pretty handy to have around.” My brain decided that a clever thing to say in response would be “well, I’m pretty well-endowed in the dongle department” and I started to say that before my brain thought better of it and cut me off. So what I actually said was “well, I’m pretty well-endowed”. One woman in the room actually guffawed but everybody else managed to ignore it - although I’m willing to bet this story was told later more than a few times.
Jesus fucking Christ, how did you not just die on the spot?
I felt the pain through my phone.
When you realize how that sounded you can save it by looking embarrassed and apologizing, and clarifying you meant something like “equipped”. Typically a gaff is better than leaving things at creepy
This one’s a
weinerwinnerDying
no worries, my brain will remind me every 45 seconds for the next 3 weeks
And keep going for the rest of your life, just at a lower frequency because there’s more screw-ups to keep getting reminded of.
ha, yep. theres a lot of backpressure there in that pipe
Lucky.
Only 3 weeks ? Lucky bastard
Weeks? Luckyyyy.
26 year old here. Happens constantly. I really wish reality would let me kinda pause time for a second like in a video game, so I have time to weigh up my options. Tbh tho, I’d probably still end up regretting things I’ve said
I’m getting better though. I can have a conversation with most people and most likely not say something completely fucking retarded. But there are times I say dumb shit and end up reliving those moments constantly in my head.
Give me that quick save/load function
One thing you can do for a pause in the conversation, is simply to put a thoughtful look on your face and stroke your chin for a moment while you figure out the best answer. This way the person you’re talking to knows that you were listening, so they don’t feel ignored, and it gives you that moments pause you need. Plus, bonus, sometimes they think you’re smarter and more thoughtful than you actually are.
Or just be honest and say “I need to think about it.” Wins hearts and minds big time.
And then you imagine the “person will remember that” up in the corner
Just like Fallout 4, I only ever select the sarcastic option.
After that, you just start anticipating this feeling and unlock social anxiety.
How to load previous save?
used to
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what?
Me starting a conversation with my dad about some mundane things that instantly turn into him talking about conspiracy theories.
Instant regret
It’s the missed quicktime events that gnaw at my soul.
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“Oh, you’re not pregnant? I thought you were, you look like it”
It’s been over 20 years and there are two that haunt me to this day.