OOPs picture is clearly a photoshopped porkchop. Who even bothers with making this shit.
theres vegan meat?
There are a bunch of fake meat products intended for vegans. Fake steaks, fake thanksgiving turkeys. Usually made out of seitan (gluten), tofu, or mung bean proteins. I don’t think any of them resemble fleshlights…
My local pan Asian has had “vegan pork uterus” for ages.
Hmm, not bad. Bit salty…
None of this is true. It’s a piece of ham that looks mildly like a vagina, and someone came up with a funny story.
Welp, I am gullible enough to think it might be real
That’s a heck of a lot more than mildly vulva
Do you think someone would do that? Just go on the Internet and lie?
Especially on a shitposting community? What’s the world coming to?
The audacity!
On the internet, no one knows you’re a dog.
Hey! This guys a phony!
Phony!!
How can it be fake if it’s not gay? Dude just ate pussy, that’s as straight as it gets.
Fake: no silicone would deform like that at conventional cooking temperatures.
Gay: user’s name is Callum.
Silicone no. But TPE, which melts ~170°C (~340°F) might. Still fake tho.
I gotta say, I did laugh though.
If it actually was attempted to be cooked in a skillet, a very, very different outcome and text message would have been shared.
Hey, what are the chances that’s some actual Pig crotch? Isn’t ham made from cured or dried pork?
Ham is made from the thighs of the pig
There’s a non-zero chance a pig had a mutation where it had a vagina on its thigh, or thighussy as the kids would say.
I don’t think putting something in a freezer would disinfect it. Stop the microbes from breading while it’s inside, but they start again quickly as soon as it gets out.
It does depend. Some microbes die when being frozen, but generally heat is much more effective (though you probably shouldn’t cook your Fleshlight and use some disinfection sprelay (etc) instead)
Maybe OP had parasitic worms in his flesh light.
*googles “how to erase thoughts”
It’s just a picture of Jack Daniels
I believe that’s the search result for “how to prevent thoughts”. Kinda similar, but there’s a difference.
spaghetti!
Ice crystals can and do rupture cells. But it’s not a good method to disinfect as a lot depends on the freezing rate resulting in different crystal sizes.
True or not this shit killed me
Rip
How does one expect freezing to disinfect?
Freezing can kill bacteria, but only at temperatures far below what the standard freezer can reach. They do this for many seafood products sold commercially.
Tbf it does. All sushi in the US is required to be frozen first for that reason
That’s only for specific fish parasites. Or else we could just freeze beef, thaw it and eat it raw.
Bruh, you can eat raw beef
That’s only because a hunk of beef is so large that many unsafe elements can’t penetrate. You trim off the outside and are left with something much safer, so long as it is consumed quickly enough. It is the same reason why you don’t need to freeze tuna, because tuna are fucking huge.
Also, be careful when grinding meat, or even cutting it, because if you end up with the shit on the outside being pushed into the cuts on the inside then none of it matters and you’re back to square fucked.
I mean, there’s a number of popular raw ground meat products that are safely produced (mettbrotchen, tartare, etc) - it’s a problem of quality control more often than not.
I didn’t exclude ground meat, only ground meat that was not carefully prepared.
Fair point
I assume that’s for parasites which some can be killed by freezing. Freezing won’t kill bacteria until about -60°C / -80°F
How does one mistake a fleshlight for edible meat?
They don’t because this is fake.
